Games

Of Stone Hearts and Blood and Wine: The Actual For Real End of Witcher 3

The Witcher game franchise finally drew to an actual for real close this spring, when CD Project RED released the second of two expansions to The Witcher 3: The Wild Hunt and a massive update to the base game. It was one part exhausting, two parts amazing – and now it’s all over forever.

Impotent Suffering: A Telltale Game of Thrones

The first season of Telltale’s Game of Thrones adventure series allows you to step inside the story of HBO’s Game of Thrones and experience everything from petty humiliation to your own unjust execution. It does not, however, allow you to experience a state of victory or accomplishment.

A Tale of 2 Witchers 2

In the lead-up to Witcher 3, Steam was selling Witcher 2 for $5, so welcome to my review of Witcher 2, a game that I like even though it kind of hated me.

Brothers: A Tale of Wait What the Hell?

I played Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons, and it was beautiful and whimsical and depressing – everything the reviews said it would be. But the ending, man. I don’t know how to feel about that.

Distractions from Mucus and Phlegm: The Dark Eye: Memoria

I spent the last week sick with a cold and, in between ordering a humidifier that wasn’t delivered until I could already sleep through the night and being afraid that I’d given myself a brain-eating amoeba by snorting tap water, I finally got around to playing The Dark Eye: Memoria.

Lego Harry Potter: The Smashening

Imagine that all of the characters from Harry Potter randomly and senselessly destroyed all the settings from Harry Potter by blasting the ever-loving fuck out of everything they saw. What you’re imagining is Lego Harry Potter for Wii.